It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home for this is where our love for each other must start. -Mother Teresa

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Add another to the Mommy Debates...

I think we all can agree that in almost all cases, moms are hard enough on themselves without getting any outside help.

Cloth diapers v disposable diapers
stay-at-home- v work-away-from-home
public school v private school v public school
breastfeeding v bottlefeeding
cry-it-out v pick-her-up
raw milk v milk v organic milk
food v gluten-free or organic or whatever
medicate for ADD v don't medicate for ADD
Co-sleep v everyone has their own beds

And then it happens, someone starts another debate. 

Can I just say this and it is aimed at no one in particular:

Elf on the Shelf needs to be added to the above list. You know everything on the debate list is good stuff. Kids live with all sorts of combinations  from that list and are being kept safely alive and feel loved.

If Elf on the Shelf bugs you than don't do it. (And hide those friends that do in your feed if you must.)

If Elf on the Shelf is a something you are really enjoying with your family than keep doing it.

Kids with Elf on a Shelf or without Elf on Shelf will remain safely alive and continue to feel loved.

Please do what works best for your family....when you have that perfected you can come over and help me. 

Okay, so let's chat. What are some other  'debates' mommies have?

Just curious, do you think that my family does or doesn't do Elf on a Shelf? Do you?


  1. Well, maybe I'm not paying attention but what is the debate on the 'Elf on a Shelf'?? We started it last year after some friends did it and their kids loved it. Matter of fact, they are still enjoying it and they are past the "Santa phase". It's become a family tradition for them and a daily conversation they enjoy. Charlotte is learning about Christmas and what it means, as much as a 4 year old can comprehend. So, not sure what the debate could even be? I believe that a child's imagination is a wonderful thing. Personal opinion is that if there is a debate, why is there a debate. It's Christmas, have fun with it!!

    1. I love that my first two comments are from dads!

      Someone shared a story with me regarding this post about how their family (teen and adult) hides a Christmas stuffed toy but Mom is the one who finds it silly places. It is cool that your friends and my friends with older children are still 'playing' together with their older children. What a good example they set for us with younger children!

      PS: Welcome to mommyland - where someone is always critical of someone else. Do dads do this?

  2. I do not think you guys do the Elf on the Shelf. ( I wont think different of you if you do)

    Do you think we do?

    1. You are right, we don't. I haven't even read the book! For Real: I think I am too lazy. (Thanks for the promise not to judge.)

      I don't think that you do. When in the world would you have time this year???? :)

    2. You are correct. I have never read the book either. Our kids do not believe in Santa anyway so there is no MAGIC to it for us. They know that their presents come from good ole mom and dad! We have told our kids that if another kid asks, do not tell them that he isn't real, as to not hurt any ones feelings, and they are ok with that. So you are correct we do not participate in the Elf on a Shelf. You are correct we do not have any time at all this year. As I was writing this response Linda sent me a text saying that Lexie is now down. We only have Libby left and I hope she gets it before Sunday!

  3. We don't do it. I didn't even know there was a book. I think the debate is whether or not people use it to makes their kids behave (doesn't this elf report to Santa on behavior?) you really need another reason to make your kids behave? Do kids only have to behave in the month of December to get gifts from a big guy in a red suit? I understand for some it's just fun, but for others it's not (I'm guessing on this!) so there is the debate. I'm with you Laura, I'm too lazy and I always have told my kids (12 months out of a year) that if they don't stop the bad behavior I'm calling Santa on my special phone number that he only gives out once you have a baby.

  4. I also have not read the book, and am too lazy to add another thing to do. That is the rotten stinking' truth. Thanks for sharing!

  5. Oh yeah, I also stopped using my prefolds when it got yucky, and am choosing not to feel guilty. At least the diapers are getting changed!

    1. Love you sneaking in a For Real! :)

  6. I say whatever works for your own family, go with that. On all the above. There is no one correct answer. Every family is different. Every family's traditions are different.

    To answer the questions:
    No, I don't think you guys do it. Why, because I saw the answer above, LOL!

    Here's what we do:
    I teach my kids about St. Nicholas of Myra. They learn that he was a real person who helped people in need and is a saint in the Catholic Church. Most of the stories of him are legends, but my kids know of the legend that he gave bags of gold to a widower whose daughters had no dowries. When the third daughter was old enough to marry the dad tried to figure out who the benevolent person was who was throwing the money through his window so he locked his windows and Nicholas "threw the bag of coins down the chimney." My kiddos believe the spirit of St. Nick aka Santa brings them presents in the same fashion.

    I love Elf of the Shelf too. We do multiple Advent traditions that focus on Jesus' coming, but I have no problem with one tradition, just for a little goofiness in the mix. The Elf reports to St. Nicholas and they try their best to get along, be nice, and act as Jesus would want. I say, anything that gets them to go 10 minutes without fighting or arguing, I'm a fan!

    1. Would love to hear what resources you use to teach about S. Nicholas.

    2. Sure!
      I actually bought two new books this year for homeschooling as most books on saints wouldn't be a great fit for the little ones.
      I got "An Alphabet of Catholic Saints" by Brenda and George Nippert. I use that for Zoe. I added a saint each week to her LOTW curriculum.
      For Cian and Grace I just go into more detail one whichever saint we are on that week. (I go with whatever letter Zoe is on unless we are at an important feast day: St. Patrick, St. Nicholas etc..) I bought and LOVE these two books:
      The Children's Book of Saints by Louis Savary, S.T.D.
      A Loyola Kids book called "Book of Saints" by Amy Welborn. (It's been my fav.)
      He'd be in any Catholic saints books in the library.
      Some websites too if interested:

  7. I figured you did, you overachieving fun mom you!!! :)

    But I don't! lol

  8. oh, goodness, the mommy debates! They are so tiring. I once had a "friend" comment and lecture me on the "dangers" of my UNcircumcised son when she happened to catch a glance as he was peeing on a sunny summer day outside.

    No elf on the shelf here...I hold conflicting emotions about it. It gets on my nerves, yet I enjoy seeing some of the antics of the elf in others facebook updates.

    1. I love that she was more upset about circumcision than outdoor peeing! :)

      I too love to see the creative ways my mommy friends are using with their elves. (Why does that sound dirty?!?)

  9. Dang, I thought I commented on this but it's not on here.
    Mommy Debates...
    Tv vs no tv
    Scary/fantasy movies vs no movies
    Soda vs no soda
    Preschool vs right to kindergarten
    So many debates when mothers should just be uniting in raising the next group of citizens together.
    As I've learned, there are so many real things that our attention but it gets lost on some.
    And No, I don't do the Elf. I don't get it and I'm too lazy.

    1. Ahhh, those are so good. Someone else mentioned Santa v. No santa!

      You are right, you have literally faced life and death decisions. I am sure that helps to put all other decisions in their places.