It is easy to love the people far away. It is not always easy to love those close to us. It is easier to give a cup of rice to relieve hunger than to relieve the loneliness and pain of someone unloved in our own home. Bring love into your home for this is where our love for each other must start. -Mother Teresa

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

H & H Assignment: Raising Girls


I hesitate to post anything about raising girls...or boys...or anything living like a dog or a fern. It is just out there for criticism or worse makes it look like you have it all together and people should copy you. 

Our assignment is raising girls because everyone in our group has at least one daughter.

It has been our blessing to parent daughters of all ages: birth though adult. We have dealt with breast feeding issues to college tuition and everything in between. We have parented some of our daughters for years while others for mere weeks. There are things we have tried to do with all of our girls no matter what:

1.Talk about the awkward stuff  We want to be the people to introduce sex, gender, puberty, and all that fun stuff. Partially because it is fun to watch your kids squirm. Partially because it is the right thing to do.

2. Not expect her to understand subtle lessons or assume she understands even if she says she does referring the above awkward stuff: Nan in particular will agree to anything in order to make us stop talking about some topics. Also, sometimes I will feel like I have explained things very throughly only to figure out that some of the most basic concepts weren't understood...that she didn't really have the base for the knowledge I was trying to share.

3. Include both Michael and I in all parts of our girls' lives even if it is just a small part  for example, we don't take Michael into the dressing room to bra shop but we let him know we are going especially for that first bra! I don't coach soccer but I attend the games and listen to all the details. Creating space for yourself as a parent inside as many areas of your child's life as possible is a good thing...and it doesn't have to be a big space!

4.Let others be a part of this process all that jazz about it takes a village is true. Other people love your children, so let them share their time, gifts, talents, listening ears, money, love, affection, and wisdom with your daughters. Every night I pray this over my children, "Lord, please place people in _____'s life that love you and will lead her closer to You."

Practically speaking, one of the things I have found works well with Nan is to share Pinterest with her. I have a board that I pin jokes, articles, blog posts, and memes. She loves to be on Pinterest  just like she loves to stay up late or sit in the front seat of the car...just because it seems like off limits and feels  grown up. Every few months, she and I sit down and go through my board for her together. It leads to some really great conversations! Here is a link to my Pinterest Board "For Nan" 

Read about how Jen, Melissa, and Carla are raising girls over on their blogs.

If you are raising or have raised a daughter, what are some things that you were intentional about doing or saying? 

1 comment:

  1. I love the idea of her own pinterest board! I have pinned stuff about my girls or for them down the road, but never have thought to make one for Grace for stuff for her to see now. Great idea!